snapping back and forth. back.... and forth. rubberbands expand, stretch, twist, turn, ball up, wrap themselves around things to keep them secure and sometimes...they break. do we as women not do the same thing??? sometimes all in one day even... I snap at everyone around. i expand my mind and circle of friends (sometimes naysayer but not enemies). i stretch myself thin beyond what i believe I can endure. i twist and wrangle myself out of uncomfortable situations and sometime stay because pain can force the very growth i am resistant to. i turn around to remind myself i'm not going that way and make the choice to ball up, sit with the pain before i release it. i wrap my arms around myself and others everyday because if you didn't need that hug i did! occasionally i have felt slightly chipped or or bent but not yet broken, but in need of repair or mending. the tribe of women i know are rubberbands....we learn to be flexible.
global citizen = kottavei
"i've always considered myself a global citizen and a nomad of the world if only in my own mind"~kottavei
i was reading along on one of the social media sites and came across this article that i cannot seem to get out of my mind. http://urbandud.wordpress.com/2013/04/29/10-beautiful-words-about-love-that-dont-exist-in-english/ . expressions related to love in other languages. some languages are universal such as a smile. this article gave me the desire to understand others interpretations of what is and how they view the world.
i am now starting my personal journey to be a true advocate and global voice for the arts as a healing tool. i am so very humble and filled with gratitude for this pathway and i've been chosen to walk. so it begins....
i recently discovered a statement made by georgia o'keefe. she speaks about how she physically burned all work prior to that we can now identify as her art. i began thinking about how i can metaphorically do the same thing. create a burned, charred ground perfect for becoming more of who i am but in a different direction. the one year haitus from shows i'm taking to spend with my art has proven to be quite challenging. creating for the sole purpose of well,...creating. no destination in site just journey. stirring my purpose, my spirit, my creative juices, planting seeds for what's to come. it is not the lack of ideas but the abundance of too many. forcing myself to edit myself visually. i suppose one way to do that is like georgia o'keefe and throw it all out and start fresh. i think there is more of a bridge from where i was... to where i'm going and instead of burning it completely down, unable to go back, i may just keep the creativity bridge in tact.
“My soul is from elsewhere, I'm sure of that, and I intend
"i didn't choose art, it chose me. I came into this world ready to create and every day I have breath, creativity will abound...sometimes if only in my own imagination"~kottavei 2012
this has been a week of imagining & contemplating the possibilities. i'm finding that when you have the ability to do multiple things that editing is very important. i have nine avenues i want to take & explore with my creativity but simply put, i have to start with one. love it. develop it fully then see if it takes me down a light filled road. and should i follow my creative intuition and it lead me to a dead end.... i'll just turn around, go back and retrieve the next idea waiting to be loved.
this first week of 52 spending time with my art has been eye opening to me. i realized that sometimes you have to finish to start fresh. finishing is part of the process. day one was counterproductive. no art was made in the process of looking for myself. then i got a burst of energy and cleaned the art studio. so a clean space is vital in the producing of new art. right? ideas are running a round in my head like birds fluttering. finding ways to make my inspirations mesh. finding ways to make the mediums i choose blend into one seamless visual cohesive piece of visual wonderfulness. in the discovery process i found brokenness, decided to repair me then see what my inner self has to say to my outer creativity. what art will i manifest while being honest and telling my truths? note to self: don't look back we're not going that way!
so i've decided to take some time off to spend more time with my art..... as of july 1,2012 i am claiming a year to delve deeply into to who i am, what i want to say and how to say it visually as an artist. it's easy to get lost in creating a livelihood and paying bills. i had to remind myself that the art i make is for ME first and foremost. the goal is to create those things i wish to. however, i'm always happy and appreciative of those who enjoy it! i will still be selling all the current work listed on the website and there may be a few new pieces added here and there. i will still continue to paint live for my community of poets & musicians! i do look forward to what the next year of creativity brings! all the days of discoveries and days of angst. they will be part of the process. part of this journey. "i am a quiet spirit with a loud presence"~kottavei 2012
"even when surrounded by others, some paths and journeys are meant to be traveled alone. you can't force companionship in these moments"
“Art is a process, not a product.”
MaryAnn F Kohl
"what would you do if you knew you could not fail?"
let me say in advance that operate under the assumption that i cannot fail. it's not that i have not had failures. i happen to see "no" as an opportunity to find a yes somewhere else. how many times have i wanted to give up just shy of the finish line that i have set? MANY! but i force myself to remember that life is about the journey itself and not necessarily the destination.
then there are the daily reminders....i love white daisies. they remind me to remain humble, beauty can come in simple packages and the most unassuming thing a can be powerful. i always call myself