some days i think maybe i should have chosen a different path but then i realized that my path chose me. i have to walk it. i tend to take the road less travelled and find it painful NOT to do so. as a wife and a mother i relinquish a lot of the parts of me that cause my authenticity and not always willingly. seasons of my life fly by and i barely have a memory to call my own. that needs to change an quickly. my art and creativity are my additional spouse and child. much like with my birthed children they required tending, caregiving and much attention. somewhere along the line my creative muse and i signed a contract and i want to honor it...now if i could just figure out how...
i stopped believing... for a minute. i bought the story dorothy sold... that if i clicked my heels together that i could go home. so if home is where the heart is and you can't do what you love are you ever REALLY home? as kids it is expected that we will dream big and the possibilities are endless but what about adults? aka "grown ups". why are our dreams less respected the older we get? are they any less valid? to have a passion for something is a gift in itself and for those who don't understand i empathize. a huge part of me lives where my art resides and i want to go there...home.
"the journey of a thousand miles begins with a single step" lao-tzu. imagine standing in one place , not moving at all as the world whizzes by you at it's normal harried pace. this is how life can feel sometimes when we try to manage relationships, parenting, careers and personal passions. it can be overwhelming. we can do all the things we desire but can only do one thing well at a time. you would never bath the baby, teleconference a business call and prepare a 12 course meal at the same time.....not sucessfully. someone or something sufferes a lack of quality. there is this teeter tottering effect when i try to balance every aspect of my life at the same time. i precariously perch on the edge of a chasm hoping no more lands in my lap least i tip over into the abyss where stress and dispare live inviting guests. therefore, from now on i will do as lao-tzu and take one step at a time.
v. kottavei williams
"i aspire to inspire"
SAGE I LOVE