lately i've been feeling overwhelmed by the breadth of things i like to do creatively. after a 4 year haitis mothering and creatively starving i want to do it all. well, of course that's not possible....to do it all and well. my meditations and prayers have been first for humanity and then for clarity. how do i combine these talents into one cohesive form of art? i am very much like a baby learning how to walk...bumping into painting, falling down and scraping my creativity, crying because i hurt my pride trying to do too much and running & seeking comfort in my inner child. eventually i will learn how to walk creatively & then run with it. in the meantime, i'm trying to be patient with myself and trust this process of redicovering the creative me.
when i create it is never about the end result. it is about the process, the doing, the releasing. remember that first feeling of being in love? the butterflies, the nervous side glances and choosing words carefully. i am very much in love with creating...so i get nervous before i start something new. i gaze adoringly at the materials i intend to work with. i chose my colors, brush strokes or subject matter carefully. i am in love with the doing part of manifesting new artwork. and since this inner creative side of myself is always with me...it's the best love that could ever be because it's always with me even when we disagree.